livingimpaired: (Default)
Ǝ⅂OϽ ([personal profile] livingimpaired) wrote in [personal profile] crudest 2018-03-15 08:57 pm (UTC)

I do not think you know what those words mean in this particular case, Baren Kaiyou.

I don't take any pleasure in this.
I am not gleefully rubbing my hands together about the situation.
Very little about this makes me happy.

I am neither self-sacrificing nor self-serving.
I am not self-centered nor altruistic in what is going on.
Because this is not for myself. If it was for myself, I would not care about his emotional or psychological state. Because if it was just for him, I would feel something warm and kind and rewarding about it all.

I feel nothing.
But I have enough morals to know I should choose the best option -- and that is all that I have.


[ Well, there is Catholic Guilt but let's not get into that. ]

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