No. I mean my–[time for annoyance to show up. mostly because he's embarrassed.]–Are you really gonna make me say it? It's like some kid in middle school, saying I confessed or whatever.
I'm gonna kick your ass if you say crush one more time.
[remember how a few minutes he was laughing about this and totally chill? that's souring now. he's just getting irritated.]
I was serious, idiot. Did you think I was joking around? I'm not you. I meant what I said. [yup. irritation's in full swing. he takes a larger swig of that alcohol, standing up.] Pisses me off when you don't take me seriously.
Well how can I take you seriously when you said shit like -
["It's – you, idiot. Not for a few nights but as many as you let me have."
He remembers. He remembers how impossible it sounded - back then and even now. It was sincere, sure, but all first crushes are sincere. It's not like Zoro to feel infatuation for someone and who knows, maybe it just takes three years to kick up those kinds of feelings -
.... right?
Baren's brow furrows and he reads Zoro's irritation, but... what, he's supposed to believe that it wasn't shallow? It wasn't a random crush? Zoro wanted to know that Baren was sincere about sleeping with him, he felt like he was properly rejected back then?
(It feels a little useless now - because Baren knows he's going home to Chuuya tonight. The sky is blue again, the world is fucked, Baren is inextricably drawn to Chuuya.)
... but he's still trying to wrap his head around this.]
So what - are you saying you were in love with me? [Or - something on its way to that?] I'm supposed to believe that?
Are you–[fucking serious. Zoro spins around, arms out, the bottle still in one hand.] –Yeah! Yeah! You're supposed to believe it now and you were supposed to believe it back then!
[because it's not like anything's changed on his side. he's just had to shift his affection from that hazy zone of romance to purely platonic. it was hard–it hurt a frustrating amount he'll never admit to–but he managed it because he had to. because that was the answer baren had given him.
or that's the answer zoro had thought baren had given him.]
And you call me the idiot. [did this mean his rejection hadn't been truly sincere? does this mean there had been a chance. a maybe, a what-if? never once had he wanted that. never once did he want to stay up late thinking about what he could have done to make it work out. especially not now, when it truly could never be.
but now? that was pretty much all he'd think about for the rest of the night.
zoro downs the rest of the whiskey and throws the bottle on the deck. it shatters but he doesn't care. he'll clean it up later. when they were back on shore. when baren was gone. he starts the boat back up again.]
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[let him pout, baren. pout and chug.]
Why the hell did it have to be him?
[it's not really a question baren has to answer. it's not really a question he wants to know the answer to. he just. needs to say it.]
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[JUST SAYING!!
But regardless he rolls his eyes.]
Which one - why him that I dated or why him that we found first?
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[he'll finally put the booze down and go back to slumping on the nearest seat.]
Could have been any of them.
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baren shakes his head at that and goes to sit down next to zoro, huffing even as he uses his shoulder to bump into him]
If Sanj is your starting point, it can really only go up from here, you know? Don't get mopey, stupid.
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[a flat look before he decides he doesn't care and waves it off. rests his arms over the back of the seat and tips his head back.]
You really think the rest are here?
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'course I do.
And just because the first one you met is your least favorite doesn't mean I'm wrong.
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[it's the first time he's ever agreed. it feels nice. like there's still some hope after all. one good thing that french prick gave him, at least.
zoro smiles despite himself.
at least until he turns his attention back to baren.]
So... who else did you sleep with? Any of them named Luffy?
[obviously baren is the common thread here.]
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[probably???? he never thought that sanji would be the curly-browed guy that zoro was looking for]
.... maybe Nami goes by a different name. Or Robin? I like ladies more than men most of the time.
If I were to give you a list of everyone I've slept with, we'd need more than a bottle of whiskey.
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[is zoro serious]
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[FULL STOP]
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[that logic makes no sense zoro]
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[IS THAT REALLY SUCCESS]
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[record scratch.]
What?
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[still. he can't help but find it funny. leaning forward to grab the bottle, he muffles a laugh against its rim.]
Kind of wish I had known before it now.
[it's all said so casually. there's not even a hint of anything but humor.]
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[record scratch.]
What?
[how far are they from shore]
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Don't let it go to your head.
[lil light headsmack there.] Just thought you were trying to piss me off all those times. Didn't know it was sincere.
[surely baren's not talking about the rejection. clearly baren understood what was happening back then.]
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Motherfucker, are you seriously telling me you didn't think I was trying to get in your pants? I would've gotten bored once you stopped reacting—
[THAT'S NOT THE IMPORTANT PART]
Rewind - when did I turn you down? Was I drunk? I don't drink that much? You're the one who led me on at the fucking hotel...!
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[what hotel? or rather, which one?]
No. It was in the apartment. You were pissed, I apologized. How the hell don't you remember that?
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You mean your crush?
[don't open this hellbox, baren, don't do it]
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You confessed a crush.
[NO HE DIDN'T, BAREN, STOP SAYING THAT]
Are you still not over that? You talk about Chuu so casually that I figured that it was over and done with.
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[remember how a few minutes he was laughing about this and totally chill? that's souring now. he's just getting irritated.]
I was serious, idiot. Did you think I was joking around? I'm not you. I meant what I said. [yup. irritation's in full swing. he takes a larger swig of that alcohol, standing up.] Pisses me off when you don't take me seriously.
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["It's – you, idiot. Not for a few nights but as many as you let me have."
He remembers. He remembers how impossible it sounded - back then and even now. It was sincere, sure, but all first crushes are sincere. It's not like Zoro to feel infatuation for someone and who knows, maybe it just takes three years to kick up those kinds of feelings -
.... right?
Baren's brow furrows and he reads Zoro's irritation, but... what, he's supposed to believe that it wasn't shallow? It wasn't a random crush? Zoro wanted to know that Baren was sincere about sleeping with him, he felt like he was properly rejected back then?
(It feels a little useless now - because Baren knows he's going home to Chuuya tonight. The sky is blue again, the world is fucked, Baren is inextricably drawn to Chuuya.)
... but he's still trying to wrap his head around this.]
So what - are you saying you were in love with me? [Or - something on its way to that?] I'm supposed to believe that?
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[because it's not like anything's changed on his side. he's just had to shift his affection from that hazy zone of romance to purely platonic. it was hard–it hurt a frustrating amount he'll never admit to–but he managed it because he had to. because that was the answer baren had given him.
or that's the answer zoro had thought baren had given him.]
And you call me the idiot. [did this mean his rejection hadn't been truly sincere? does this mean there had been a chance. a maybe, a what-if? never once had he wanted that. never once did he want to stay up late thinking about what he could have done to make it work out. especially not now, when it truly could never be.
but now? that was pretty much all he'd think about for the rest of the night.
zoro downs the rest of the whiskey and throws the bottle on the deck. it shatters but he doesn't care. he'll clean it up later. when they were back on shore. when baren was gone. he starts the boat back up again.]
Screw this. We're heading back.
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